Garden Of Eden

All songs previously unreleased
1 from the forthcoming DRT album Adam’s Apple
2-6 recently discovered alternate versions
7 outtake from Adam’s Apple

After the sad death of Kenny Craddock, songs 2-6 emerged on a forgotten reel of arrangements recorded before the Why We Fight sessions. They sounded so good to me, and the versions were so different, that I wanted to let them be heard. The original drums had been erased and the lead vocals were by Kenny rather than me, so we did what we had to, here they are and I hope you like them. It was about time Kenny and I did some duets.

All songs written by John Wesley Harding, Plangent Visions Music, Inc. [ASCAP]

1,7 produced and mixed by Eric Kupper at Hysteria Recording, Weston, CT

2-6 produced by Kenny Craddock (1993)Played and arranged by Kenny Craddock and Colin Gibson, Hastings (many thanks, Colin)
Reproduced by JWH and David Seitz (2003)

Vocals by JWH, recorded by David SeitzBass (2,4) by JWH, recorded by Hilary Hoekinga

Drums by Ethan Eubanks, recorded by Oliver Straus at Mission Sound, Brooklyn

Mixed by David Seitz at Shelter Island Sound, NYC Assisted by Sasha Victory

Mastered by Tom Hutton at Bionic Mastering, NYC

Management: Michael Dixon Management Booking Agent: Mike Leahy at Concerted Efforts (concerted@concertedefforts.com)
Cover Painting: The Fall of Man by Cornelis van Haarlem
Insert Etchings: Albrecht Durer
Design: Abbey Tyson

Monkey And His Cat

And the crowned heads of Europe cheer the wonder of the age
Cos the cat’s just like a bird and good old monkey grinds the tune
And the cat will dance fandangos just above the footlight moon
And then he’ll make a very birdlike sound
And monkey makes him flop upon the ground
As though he’s flying
Some people he’s dying
Man got his monkey, monkey got his cat
Cat got his flea, flea’s got me
And everybody’s free to work on their act
Monkey and his cat

The cat hisses at monkey as he milks all the applause
Above the clank of change that ricochets across the floor
And monkey says “I love you” and returns him to the cage
And bows to all the ladies as they exit from the stage
The cat is dressed up as a Puss In Boots
And monkey wears a sparkling new suit
Just like a human
All the girls are swooning
Man got his monkey, monkey got his cat
Cat got his flea, flea’s got me
And everybody’s free to work on their act
Monkey and his cat

Monkey and his cat retrieve the key and go within
The humble home sweet home where they quietly live in sin
A man will bring their supper as they sit before the fire
Once he was the grinder, now he has to work for hire
He didn’t keep his finger on the pulse
The audience demanded something else
A new distraction
Some cat and monkey action
Man got his monkey, monkey got his cat
Cat got his flea, flea’s got me
And everybody’s free to work on their act
Monkey and his cat

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

Kill the Messenger

The messenger came with bad news from the front
Said "The soldiers are starving and their swords are all blunt
They need a show of support or some futile sign
That’s what they told me to tell you, not even the words are mine..."

The messenger came with bad news from the war
Said "The fine young men forgot who they were fighting for
They don’t wanna be stars on your TV screen
That’s the general feeling, please don’t blame it on me"

And the people said "One and one is two
There’s nothing left for us to do
But since we can blame it all on you
We will kill the messenger"

The messenger came with bad news from the town
Said "The phone-lines are on strike and the doormen are all down
They’ve turned your den of thieves into a temple
They need someone of stature to set them an example"

And the people said "Two and two is four
Don’t tell us anymore
We all know the score
We must kill the messenger"

Someone brought the news to the messenger’s folks
He said "Your son’s been killed two times"
They said "Is that a joke?"
He said "No
He was he victim of ignorant minds
I hate to bring such bad news, please don’t think me unkind"

And the family said "One and one is two
There’s nothing left for us to do
But since you’re here and we can blame it on you
We will kill the messenger

So if you want to send a message...

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

Hitler’s Tears

One man’s tears stain the pillow
Where he used to lay his head
She’s left him for another man
So how come they’re both sleeping in his bed?
He can hardly sleep for misery
You can hear him catch his breath
And he grinds his teeth into the night
And God says "Hey, Adolf, are you alright?"

One boy’s tears stain the paper
Where he writes his Christmas list
And he inks in broken German
"Send me the skill of a fine artist"
Then he wipes out half a continent
With one flick of his wrist
He’s so lonely, so misunderstanding
As he pulls his blanket across the landing

You can hear them falling every day (Hitler’s tears)
Just open up the newspaper (Hitler’s tears)
You can hide, there’s no escape from Hitler’s tears--
Just what makes the führer blue?
He’s crying for you

One man’s tears--he was a fascist
Before it was cool
’Cos now it’s so expected
Just accept it that power is cruel
So he’ll apply for reinstatement
By new reincarnation rules
’Cos he’s the only man, most certainly
Who could claim to have learned from history

Hitler cries himself to sleep, alone in Brazil, no-one calls
How must it feel to be the biggest loser of them all?

One man’s tears--saltwater salutes the final trip
A thousand naughty Nazis
A fraülein with a bullwhip
A lullaby of Über Alles
A shaking upper lip
It’s all become a Whitehall farce
That’s how we tear our fears apart
But you shouldn’t take it straight to heart
So the rest of us can get some sleep tonight

You can hear them falling everyday...

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

When Dreams Come True

Nice girls are writing in journals
Things they wish they’d done
And all their bad sisters are walking high wires
Counting the days in a month
The awful truth doesn’t bear thinking
Nor does the half-baked lie
They get their hopes dirty once in a while
Wash them and hang them to dry
Everyone’s down except for the clowns
And Noah don’t know where to go
It’s hell up in heaven, there’s nothing much here
And all the real men are below

What happens when dreams come true?
Will we know what to do
When our dreams come true?

So a saviour rolls in past the big sign
That says "Strangers - Please Turn Round"
The men tie him up to a feeding post
And take his credentials down
The sun beats rays on our salad days
His lips get parched and dry
The girls bring him drink with a giggle and a wink
And his moment of glory expires

What happens when dreams come true?
Will we know what to do
When our dreams come true?

Mr.Sandman can’t believe it
He thought he gave them what they needed
You couldn’t get no higher
Than a handsome dark Messiah
But he’s got one more trick up his sleeve,
Before he gives up once again

A Siren goes off as she walks in
As the cowboy lies dying in the dust
She walks through the room where the gentlemen gather
Surrounded by debris and rust
She smoulders and steams, straight out of their dreams
But no-one will talk to her first
Big words are just words
They’re small and absurd
She leaves and we all die of thirst

What happens when dreams come true?
Will we know what to do
When our dreams come true?

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

The Original Miss Jesus

"Hey you" she said
"I think that I have something in my eye"
And she posed beneath the standard lamp
As her clothes waved goodbye
And she was
Naked as a new apology
For something she hadn’t yet done
And he said "Did I ever tell you the one about
The Original Miss Jesus?"

"Born before
Her more famous little brother Mister Christ
Sure, there were miracles
But out of the public eye
So they didn’t
Think even to have her crucified
She just wrote some novels and then she died
And only her family cried for her
The Original Miss Jesus

And then he came
The one that they wrote all the books about
The King of the Rock Opera
Whom she could do without"

"Stop!" she said
"Jesus could have been a boy or girl
History would still have been unkind
If he’d been a her
Anyway
Just watch me turn this beer into air
As for Redemption Value, I don’t care
But if you want, I’ll even pretend to be
The Original Miss Jesus"

So she was
The saviour
Of that sad and lonely room.

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

Where The Bodies Are

Somebody went and killed some people
And they know who
The evidence fits around the facts
Like a favourite shoe
But nobody knows where the corpses are
Their whereabouts unknown
The killer’s in a frenzy
And he’s getting on the phone
So they put their thinking hats on
And spread out in their cars
But only I know where the bodies are

You know they can i.d. someone
From one cell of skin
But they couldn’t spot a crime scene
If the killer went and let ’em in
To genetic fingerprinting
We all take off our hats
To hide the little stains that spread
Across the welcome mat
You can put your best foot forward
And wish upon a star
But only I know where the bodies are

Lawyers defending guilty men
Depending on the bid
The question isn’t if they’re guilty
But if they’ll get acquitted
Justice goes unjustified
Beneath a police chief and an eagle
Pain’s too difficult to prove
They’re not going to make pain illegal
To think that we were once naive
To think we’ve come this far
To think that only I know where the bodies are

Some people don’t wanna know
The facts behind the scam
Or see "Who could I be?"
Peeking out behind "The great I am"
But most of us got enough to think about
Husbands and wives
To notice pointless death’s become
A brand new way of life
And this is just a sandwich board
That I wear out in the park
Saying only I know where the bodies are
(And I’m not telling you.)

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)

Slippery Slide To Bliss

We used to ruin almost everything
We brought elation to its knees
Locked the song of love in Sing Sing
Bad things don’t always come in threes
We musta stayed together on a dare
You plus me was bad enough
Til we were hell squared

We used to argue over everything
We were the first to split the hair
It so clearly wasn’t happening
We didn’t even seem to care
But something subtle this way came
Til we stopped scoring points
And playing silly games

And now we walk along the road in total happiness
And people stop and smile when we kiss
Now we’re walking hand in hand in total happiness
And I know what this is
We’re on the slippery slide to bliss

Now no-one needs to gain the upper hand
It doesn’t matter who is right
You are the one who can strike up my band
I’m the man who flies your kite
And who are we to ask the question why?
The sun is shining in our eyes
Let’s love some more before we die

And now we walk along the road in total happiness
And people stop and smile when we kiss
Now we’re walking hand in hand in total happiness
And I know what this is
We’re on the slippery slide to bliss
(Slippery slide to bliss)
We’re on the slippery slide to bliss

Oh, it was so gradual
It went to bad from worse
Slowly, so we barely noticed it
And then the change was obvious
When bad became ok
And ok segued slowly into this….

And now we walk along the road in total happiness
And people stop and smile when we kiss
Now we’re walking hand in hand in total happiness
And I know what this is
We’re on the slippery slide to bliss
(Slippery slide to bliss)
We’re on the slippery slide to bliss

Music and lyrics by John Wesley Harding (Plangent Visions Inc., ASCAP)